Living Life for Christ Alone

The lights are out, and I sit in the rocking chair holding my sixteen-month-old, singing softly to her and rocking slowly in the rocking chair.  I close my eyes and breathe. It is quiet, except for the sound of the noise machine and air conditioning running. The sun peers just a little around the door, but it is just the right atmosphere to coax her to sleep. As I hum, I look down at her face. The pacifier is in her mouth and her blankie by her face. She looks so cozy there all snuggled up to me.  And then, her eyes start blinking slowly. Sleep starts taking over. One by one, whatever cares she had, she lets go of. I feel her muscles relax. If her hands were playing with something, they go limp. Her breathing gets deep. And all of a sudden, it is as if time stands still.  I can't explain it, but I never get tired of this moment. It is magical. It rights all wrongs in the day. The morning could have been chaotic and messy, but it doesn't take away from this moment. Instead...

The other day, I envisioned myself on a path I've never walked on before, full of difficulty and unknowns.  "Lord," I'd say, "I've never walked this path before. This is unfamiliar territory." "Yes," He'd say, "And I will be with you every step of the way." That would be enough to put a smile on my face and urge me forward -for He truly would be enough. ... "The Lord is my Shepherd," said the psalmist in Psalm 23:1, "I have all that I need." Whoa. Was he serious? Everything? Yes... God is everything we need. We just don't realize it most of the time because we think we need other things. We see how other people are bolstered and think it must really be working, but if we were to get a glimpse at their soul, we would instantly know it isn't.  If you really think about it, if you have God -who clothes the grass of the field and feeds the birds of the air- you have everything.  You have the One who makes i...

This morning, my girls and I went for our near-daily walk and the sky was almost cloudless with a slight breeze blowing. It was lovely, especially for a typical day in the middle of Florida's summer with all the not-so-glorious heat and humidity. But then, as the morning wore on, clouds rolled in and rains poured down, covering our yard with puddles.  And now, as I write, the sun is shining brightly in our yard with clouds hanging low in the distant sky.  One can never be quite sure what will happen next... More rain? Or how about a cloudless sky? It really could go either way. I feel like circumstances can be like that. Sometimes, the good ones stretch over months, and other times, they last only a few short minutes. And yet, how quickly and easily we put our hope in them. I don't know about you, but my emotions are often intricately tied into my circumstances, and as a result, they can be so... unstable. One minute, the sun of circumstances shines brightly, so my soul shines...

"My soul, wait silently for God alone, for my expectation is from Him. He only is my rock and my salvation. He is my defense; I shall not be moved." (Psalm 62:5-6) It is in stillness and quiet that we really see God. It is when our eyes are set only on seeing Him that other sights are able to dim before His glorious presence.  Silence. I feel like it's a lost art.  Most of the time, my own soul is full of noise. Worries and cares. Distraction. People I care about. Circumstances I often seek to control. Goals I aim for. Things I'm doing that I'm deeply engrossed in. I start the day all too often with what seems like thousands of thoughts swirling in my mind.  Our moments of "quiet" often amplify the noise in our soul. Ever noticed that?  Maybe it's because we are actually settling down to listen, and that's the first thing we hear.  How do we wait  in silence  for God?  Perhaps it has more to do with expectation than we realize. Maybe there is a l...

It's way too easy to fall into a pit of condemnation and shame, isn't it?  I don't know about you, but there are many moments in my life where even the smallest of missteps in my life are like big arrows pointing deep into my soul, accusing me of being the worst person on the planet.  Too much time is spent in this pit, pondering the "what if I hadn't done that?" questions, as well as the "is there any hope for me now?" question. Or there are other times where I've jumped straight to the "there is no hope for me now" conclusion. Do you relate?  As one who can easily overthink things, I have often found myself digging deeper into this pit, simply because I am good at finding more reasons to do so.  But as one who has been bought by the blood of Jesus, is this really where I should be living? I am His, am I not?  Didn't His sacrifice and glorious resurrection make it possible for us to get back up when we fall and not even look back w...

I'm going to do some boasting on here. I'm really weak. Adulting, being a mother with two little precious toddlers 18 months apart in my care, having much on my plate -these things and more have helped me feel it. Almost daily, I find myself freshly aware that I do not have all the answers. I often feel the crushing weight of needing to make hundreds of micro decisions each day press in around me. The temptation to be discouraged before the day has even begun is real, because if I look too much at myself, I will see so much potential to fail. Don't get me wrong. I love my life. It's full, really full, in a lot of really good ways. But I am weak, and I am so very often conscious of it. There are days when I don't feel like I can take any more and would love a break. There are times when I want to retreat into a dark corner somewhere and throw a pity party. There are times when what is going on in my soul is not pretty. HOWEVER. It has been SO good for me. Let me expl...