Living Life for Christ Alone

"Much-Afraid shrank back. 'I am afraid,' she said. 'I have been told that if you really love someone you give that loved one the power to hurt and pain you in a way nothing else can.' "'That is true,' agreed the Shepherd. 'To love does mean to put yourself into the power of the loved one and to become very vulnerable to pain, and you are very Much-Afraid of pain, are you not?' "She nodded miserably and then said shamefacedly, 'yes, very much afraid of it.' "'But it is so happy to love,' said the Shepherd quietly. 'It is happy to love even if you are not loved in return. There is pain too, certainly, but Love does not think that very significant.' ... "'...Love and Pain go together, for a time at least. If you would know Love, you must know pain too.'"  -Hinds Feet on High places // "...If you would know love, you must know pain too." How close to home this phrase hits.  It is painful

The sun was shining in the window as I held our newest little blessing in my lap and fed her a bottle.  I could hear my two-year-old crying in her crib, while my three-year-old softly tried to talk sense to her from her bed across the room. (It's hilarious to overhear, but that's a whole other topic.) I looked up at the clock and my heart sank.  "Late again," I thought. "Poor girls... When will I get the timing of the morning down? No wonder Avi is so upset."  As usual, I felt like kicking myself. Two weeks of this, and I still don't have it down....  A gentle nudge from within stopped me from going any further down that path.  "Do you really expect to be mistake free?"  // The last couple of weeks have been uncomfortable for me as I learn the ropes of endless paperwork, visits, communication with people involved in the foster care system, court dates and building a relationship with the baby's biological family.  It would certainly be a lo