Living Life for Christ Alone

Recently, I went through a very painful experience. The death of a dream I had thought was coming true. The loss of something I thought I had gained permanently. Never had I experienced something so difficult before. Never had I guessed that this was going to happen to me. ...But it did. And it hurt. I praise God for His healing power at work in me... As I write, I write not only to you, but to myself as one who is learning on this journey too.  This morning, as I was reading in the Psalms, I came across a Psalm that hadn't stood out to me in this way before. As I read, I realized that I was looking at me in the mirror of God's word.

Does surrender save you? I realize that question might have startled you, because it's rather upfront and to the point. Recently I had the privilege of spending time with someone who was struggling with this question.  She had prayed to receive Christ rather recently. In the time since she'd done that, she had heard the phrase, "surrender your life to Christ" in reference to salvation.  "I don't know if I'm going to heaven," she said to me with a look of fear on her face, "because I don't know that I've given Jesus everything." 

"Oh God, do you even love me?" The question escaped my lips before I could even begin to think how "unchristian" it was. The darkness seemed to envelop my vision and I could not see the One I was speaking to... was He even there? How could He be when I felt so far from Him?  ...No, He couldn't be. Desperately, I looked around me, looking for solace, but the wind kept blowing, the waves kept beating against me, threatening to knock me down.  "What is He doing?" I asked myself. 

Uncertainty hangs thickly in the air. Perhaps it's uncertainty of the future, perhaps it's uncertainty about something going on right now. Maybe life isn't as promising as it used to be. The once young, ambitious Christian who has now gotten older in years has become  cautious  and unwilling to step out onto the wings of faith in the midst of a storm. That uncertainty is often so thick that one can't see through it. Threatening voices whisper, "It won't be ok! Everything is going to fall apart!" And the eyes of the Christian dart every which way, looking at his storms, gripped by one very powerful vice of the enemy ...that being fear.