Living Life for Christ Alone

The sun was shining in the window as I held our newest little blessing in my lap and fed her a bottle.  I could hear my two-year-old crying in her crib, while my three-year-old softly tried to talk sense to her from her bed across the room. (It's hilarious to overhear, but that's a whole other topic.) I looked up at the clock and my heart sank.  "Late again," I thought. "Poor girls... When will I get the timing of the morning down? No wonder Avi is so upset."  As usual, I felt like kicking myself. Two weeks of this, and I still don't have it down....  A gentle nudge from within stopped me from going any further down that path.  "Do you really expect to be mistake free?"  // The last couple of weeks have been uncomfortable for me as I learn the ropes of endless paperwork, visits, communication with people involved in the foster care system, court dates and building a relationship with the baby's biological family.  It would certainly be a lo...

"Who will go for Me?" The voice echoes in the chambers of my heart. I raise my hand. "I will go for You, Father."  He smiles and nods. "Yes, you, my daughter, may go for Me."  But as I go on the mission that He has assigned to me I find that I cannot execute it without failure. It seems that the farther I go, the more aware I become of my own weakness.  Shame rises up within. He could have picked someone far more qualified. Why did I volunteer myself to pursue those things that matter to Him when I can't even do it right? I become like Adam and Eve and try to cover up my weaknesses with coverings of my own making. I weave together a covering of self-made righteousness and move further along into the mission assigned to me, but again I trip and fall. Even the self-made righteousness cannot hold me up.  I weave together another covering of more rules to live by -boundaries set to keep me from falling off the pathway and leaving the mission He gave me. Ag...